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I been at this a long time, although my family didn’t get the “nationwide” camera coverage we had huge losses!  It doesn’t dismiss that I saw a lot and no I wasn’t living in any bad neighborhoods.

The ten men in my life who died were victims of gun violence… And most were all relatives! The scary part is that before the rise on terror my family has already experienced it… In my life as a child I had experienced too many tragedies  to gun violence. Starting with a  neighbor who I saw being murdered in his wheelchair…robbed and shot in the head, a childhood friend who brains were blown out in front of my brother. Another, was someone who was close to my family he was shot in the head in back of my grandmother’s house on the next block. I wasn’t even 16 years old and this wasn’t even touching the surface in how many male relatives died in this manner . And no this isn’t including  everyone I knew  that  died brutally die to gun violence. 

People had already grown numb. The gun violence become only new to those who finally get to the reality …gun violence has hit their homes or communities.  No one can shed just as much light as I can on this continual curse of death by guns!

I wont downplay anyone’s experience with it… I just know it’s gut wrenching! I haven’t been so silent about the lack of involvement my family who has tremendous losses due to gun violence. Like so many, they don’t want any parts in it. That is why I speak for those who aren’t getting all that focus on their tragedies. Every loss is important to me. Pain is pain. You have to be an insensitive individuals to not allow your heart to be moved with compassion when people tell their stories.  Sometimes I can handle it and there are days I can’t listen to another story.  I thank God for what little light is being shed but I am still not with the bowing and praising…. My story is huge  and I have told them many times… Of my family loss. My disappointment comes in when everyone turned their backs  on the people who suffer that so many never heard of it. It’s as if certain people had more pain than others.  

My first time dealing with it head on… was when I joined then Senator and Pastor Meeks… for prayer in front of a Chuck’s Gun Shop in Riverdale, Illinois. The crowd with us what still was about real results But we are still plagued with the crowd of being huge but  without true boldness and substance.  Numbers are impressive to people not with me.  I need the boldness and power hitters. I can spot the nonsense of just noise!

We prayed and even then I didn’t grasp how maddening the gun violence became because like so many I didn’t want to remember the pain  I wanted to be more than heard. I wanted results!

I had to deal with the aftermath of being disowned by people like today…  and certain family members .  I  was a little to radical for  appearances with my boldness and my courage to take down strongholds.  I was embarrassed at the lack of boldness even with the church. A bunch of noise and no power!  We made national headlines for praying in front of a gun shop. I didn’t gain support  I grew haters for my passion to bold with it! I definitely became the family “black sheep” but with the church as well….  I was too outspoken… and too bold with my evangelism about who and what I represent and a lot hasn’t  change.  I might be apart of the fight but I know the real powers that be… and I have yet to see radical gun laws…  Money is talking …in many circuits and not’s just in government but rallying as well! 

Here is where I think I had to come to grip with standing up for what is right… 1) Some people play the game around it they will only go so far.

2) Some get rich off of other folks misery…it becomes the game its the most popular thing to do.

3) There are the complainers but are too afraid to get all the way in with it and want to tell other how it should be done.

4)If you want to do it right  with integrity you might have to stand alone! I have been around the talks of gun violence and protesting a long time but I have yet, to see when will the masses  will stop the insanity of doing the same things but expect different results. 

I am amazed at the excitement of nothing. We haven’t made any huge milestones on gun control. We have more organizations than ever. Yet, we have to come in all directions full throttle. We limit the talks and dumb down on other serious issues that can ward death off at the abuse of  guns!

I am learning to skip the talking this has been going on at least in my family over 100 deaths later!  Its time to go for all the main arteries to gun control… Lets do the initial step… Ask yourself…are any violent instigators in your personal circle… People think gun violence starts with the trigger but it actually starts with the attitude. So many “avoid” confrontation of the character of people. Guns wont shoot without a person!  I pursue manufacturers full throttle but I am personally waiting on genuine up close and personal addressing the lack of family values and demoralizing of life.  I know that we want everyone to be responsible gun owners and I know that “term” is limited until a situation may arise.

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