Chicago, Community and Social Activism, Diabetes, Education, Erectile Dsyfunction, Family Relationships, Infidelity, marriage, Marriage and the Family, Men's Health, Prayer and intercession, relationship with God, Sexual Healtlh, twin brother
WARNING… A MATURE SUBJECT… IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE THIS MIGHT NOT BE THE POST FOR YOU READ…
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Some years ago… a very close friend of mines who is now deceased had a twin brother. The twin brother had been separated from his wife and move in with her…
To honest with you the wife had become abusive in mentally and physically. And you can painfully see that the whole family had become mentally discombobulated! I sense that there were some other issues but I left it alone.
One Sunday afternoon after church… He wanted to speak with me about a matter which was odd because he and I had no report… He said, I know that you are straight up… and I honestly need to talk about something that is bothering me.
He began to tell ask me questions ( I am paraphrasing) How would I love a man? Odd, again… I asked him which answer he preferred as a woman or a minister… I’m serious! Because often when people want to speak with I’m easy to listen to anyone no matter what the subject matter is.
I am not afraid of being candid about anything including sex. He said…Well, I got this cousin, and he is diabetic and lost a lot of feeling down there! I said okay… You’re speaking about erectile dysfunction… being afraid to say … yes… I went on! I knew his cousin and he was a “bitter” brother… Who had taken very ill because of complications of some kidney situation due to diabetes.
I shared with him…If you are truly in love with your spouse… Sickness is not supposed to be death sentence or a deal breaker…He then went on to say that because of the medication issues were occurring that is wife was having an affair… Okay! He said that he wanted his back was thinking about taking this little blue pill… I told him the risk involved wasn’t worth it… I left it right there and I didn’t give the conversation much thought after that!
Stay right here! The story doesn’t stop here it begins in another fashion… Months passed… Realizing that after her brother and I had this conversation…He gets this girlfriend on the side…And yes, he was very much still married! This woman that he became heavily involved with he had begun divorcing proceedings.
I prayed to myself… this wasn’t good. I was so boldly to say this… “BE CAREFUL… stay friends because if you are so in love…she will wait until you get some clarity on what it is he wanted to do”.
Keep in mind…I wanted to know what was the rush. If you are so in love seems like to me… You’d like know if he is really done with his marriage, allow him to get his head together. She applied some kind of pressure or tried to bird dogging him some kind of way… I knew something was not right!
We have to be careful making decisions out of emotions. I clearly made it known… that hurrying for another disaster is another death sentence. He was already stressed to max dealing with a wife who was beyond irrational… I mean she was like the devil!
The woman “seem” to care about him but the bells and whistles went off inside of me. He wanted to speak with me again… Of course, the girlfriend thought maybe he and I something going on… But he just sought me out to talk with… Oddly within maybe a year… He was seeing her on a regular and practically staying with her at her place.
The girlfriend wanted to pull his sister to the side in front of me … of course… I knew instantly this dumb conversation was for my benefit…I knew she was jealous that he confided in me so much as a sister friend! Her mission was to marry him quickly just in case I was the alternate.
She said they were thinking about marriage… I said “Sweet Jesus” to myself… I had already told him… He has to clean up what he hadn’t finished and why was he even thinking about marriage after this last disaster?
And I mean THIS GOT CRAZY! He began his mission to divorce his wife and he seem happier to everyone but to me… I had that “nagging” that said don’t you dare keep your mouth closed on this… I warned him to take his time… He jumping from frying pan to the fire…
I knew he going to the doctor a lot. Strangely, I always spot the oddest things. He was eating a lot of these sausages and boiled eggs as a ritual. Nothing ever healthy.
So, his girlfriend started cooking him healthier meals.. which was a start… and still I had that nagging…something is so off! On this particular Thursday… he had this accident a pallet fell off a forklift at work almost killing him. He had jump quickly and hurt his left arm.
I was so uncomfortable with the whole incident and I just couldn’t explain it but I told his twin. Something is going awry with him and I knew something else was coming… He had been taken to the hospital and only I saw him rubbing his left arm a lot!
What happens next… READ PART II